Since I started sharing my different approach to Human Design, some of my readers reported that they experienced anxiety [...]
Since I started sharing my different approach to Human Design, some of my readers reported that they experienced anxiety.
It is something that seems to happen when you're deep down in your Human Design experiment. It's tough for the mind not to become attached to the chart. And the way Ra Uru Hu presents his teachings, in a very dogmatic way (at least, his post-1997 teachings mostly), is just more fuel for your mind trying to fit in all these boxes.
You could say that it is actually "healthy" to dismiss the whole dogmatic approach to Human Design. But not a lot of people seem to succeed in doing that. I was deep into it, too, for nearly two years, until I got shocked into a different reality, which was my "escape", in a sense. Ever since, I've been actively "deprogramming" myself, but still, my mind keeps on wanting to grasp for straws. Anything that would make my mind feel safe in its beliefs...
But that's the thing: Human Design is not a belief system.
If it was, it would be very cult-like. And that's actually how I see Jovian Archive today. Because of this dogmatic approach, it seems that Human Design evolved into some kind of religion with Ra Uru Hu as its prophet. I didn't see it at first, so it eventually became quite the painful wake-up.
Of course, the mind wants certainties.
It wants someone to tell it how things are and need to be to work with that. If I tell you that you are designed to create new things out of the old, because you are this Manifestor type, you'll take it. Your mind will take anything so that it doesn't have to "not know". It depends, of course, on what you're able to tolerate (or not).
But when I look at a Human Design chart now... I actually acknowledge that I know nothing. What's in the chart is not written in stone. It's just a representation of what's possible. And to know what to do with it, you would need to sit with it, contemplate it, meditate on it, practice conscious awareness in your life, and finally see how it shows up for you (or not).
I can never fill that in for you. And it's even hard to fill that in for myself because, in reality, I can be so much. There are so many possibilities. Nothing is written in stone. It depends on what you're willing to go with.
And therefore, it is so important to choose wisely. Not because someone says so or because it's written in a book. But because, after much contemplation, meditation, and practicing awareness, you get to that point that you deeply know within your heart and soul... and yet, that can change. At least, we're not these rigid beings; we're actually more fluid than we think.
Most of the time, we seem to go with what the mind wants, not even realizing how untrue that is for our heart and soul. And often, we "think" we're listening to our heart and soul, while, in reality, it's just more of the mind talking.
So yeah... that anxiety that arises when you suddenly realize you bought into something and then that something changed overnight... it's a horror to the mind. Suddenly, everything feels uncertain and unsafe. And the mind gets into this frantic panic trying to hold on to something "certain". But it isn't there... not on the mind level.
It's a very sobering experience. It can lead to all sorts of mental anxiety and disorders (over time).
It's also fueled by unresolved early-childhood trauma, of course, because then was the first time that we experienced not feeling safe. This causes us to adjust to things and people that don't align with our nature, just for the sake of survival. And our society isn't built in a way to support resolving that trauma. But maybe it will be, one day, who knows (I'm way more optimistic than Ra Uru Hu was with all his gloom and doom for the future, lol).
When mental anxiety arises, the mind frantically starts searching for new certainties to hold on to. But there's another way. We can sit with the discomfort of experiencing anxiety and observe it, knowing deep within that we are always safe and that we do not need certainties in our lives to enjoy life.
Deep down, you "know" who you are. You just don't know that on a mental level. And you don't need to. The mind will never know in its minimal capacity to understand. The mind has a different purpose. But as long as we don't see that, we'll always get trapped in these dogmatic systems and then be shocked into reality once again, like a never-ending cycle, until we open our minds to all possibilities.